She was standing in front of her dresser mirror looking at the age around her eyes, wondering when that one gray hair was going to invite friends to the party of chestnut curls. We had matching light blue t-shirts with seagulls on the front that came from Virginia Beach. I was eight and she was perfect through my eyes, the eyes that matched hers.

In 1975 she was 29 years old when she chose to leave my dad. With 3 kids under the age of 7, I can only imagine how this choice shaped the person she became and the 40-year old woman that I am today. This choice didn't come easy or without personal baggage. Thankfully my sister, brother and I, all completed the trip with just a carry-on.

She showed strength of courage by going to work every day. When we were really little she worked the night shift so she could be home with us during the day and after school. She chose nursing as a profession and continued to pursue her education over the years. She cared for her patients like she cared for us, with a no nonsense manner and kindness. Her 45-year career has raced through a trauma filled ER, changed dressings and ventilators in the burn unit, and flown jump seat on med flight. As her career comes to a close she now has numerous letters behind her name, thousands of continuing education hours, and a circle of friends that shared her shifts and enriched her life.

Raising three kids as a single parent wasn't glamorous, we lived for many years in a small apartment, but we always had a hot dinner, shoes that fit and pearls of wisdom that have stuck with me. Admittedly at the time, a saying of "it's who you are on the inside that matters, not how pretty you are on the outside, Jennifer" would annoy me because I longed for the blonde hair over my mousy brown. Another favorite was "you're lucky in life if you have 5 really true friends, people come and go but real friends can be counted on one hand". Those statements would spout out of her mouth when I was in middle school crying my eyes out because Janie wouldn't talk to me anymore because of some boy. She was right about Janie and that stupid boy, they were only real at the moment they never made the short list.

Now that I am grown up, I realize my mom isn't perfect, but who is? She did the best she could at the time and along the way she figured how to move forward every day, she taught us kids to stand on our own two feet, and she always had time to listen. Her sense of self and determination is now my standard that I live by.

While I stand at the bathroom mirror the circle closes with my own eight-year-old daughter watching me with eyes like her mothers.